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Dreamception, part 1

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Music’s blaring in the background indistinctly just like it does in the movies after the hero has been knocked down. Timbaland’s old cool songs I reckon, the ones that makes you want to jam and bust a move.

I’m in the center of the space where 5th year students hold their annual ceremonial ritual of beginner dancing, amateur yet impressive vocal cords abilities, and band-rocking the stage.

A few people are behind me in a V formation. I’m wearing baggy clothes: over-sized banana-republic sweat pants, Adidas’ tank top, and nikes. Have you spotted the irony yet?

Hold up… Am I a lead dancer? Wow… I’ve been day-dreaming about this since middle school when I looked like a walking bowling ball. I used to listen to RnB, rap, and pop music on a daily basis. Akon, Eminem, 50 cent, Kardinall Official, Usher, Keri Hilson, Ne-Yo, Justin Bieber, – Shame on me, I know – etc.

I’d walk around with headphones on, creating choreographies in my head. If there was a magical machine capable of replicating the synaptic signals hay-wiring the images into my brain and transmitting them onto a screen, I’d be a rich and a famous choreographer. I swear to God!

But it doesn’t work like that, does it? Sad. I just kept to my day-dreaming activities.

But wait, I’m not day-dreaming right now. What the heck is going on? I look left to right and see the crowd’s cheering and applauding. I look up and I see me and the crew on a huge screen. This is one hell of a show!

  • « Focus mate. Are you dead? Are you asleep? Try to punch yourself in the crotch and see if it wakes you up. »
  • « What? No? Wait. Who said that? HEY WHO SAID THAT? »
  • « I’m you, moron. My twisted humor hasn’t revealed that much to your slow brain? »
  • « What.the.hell? »

I cannot believe my eyes…

As my eyes lift from the ground up, they pick up brown dress shoes, navy blue slacks, a pink-ish dress shirt, a red bowtie, and my… face?

I’m in utter disbelief. There’s an over-dressed replica of ME in front of ME. He has the same wavy black hair, the same narrow eyes, the same beak-like nose, and the same small hands. He has my nice butt too! I must’ve been smoking a joint and I’m experiencing the after effects.

  • « Shut up and focus moron. You’re obviously not dead otherwise you wouldn’t be able to talk to me because… HELLO I’M IN YOUR BRAIN! »
  • « Why are you talking to me? »
  • « For God’s sake, is this really how I sound in real life? What are you? A one-digit IQ toddler? I’m here trying to help you make sense of what you’re experiencing. DUH! »
  • « Alright, alright, enough with the insults. I’ve enough insecurities already. And hold up, why am I submitting to you? »
  • « MORON FOCUS! »
  • « Fine. But this isn’t over half-wit. »
  • « There’s that spark. Atta boy! Now, onto the main issue. We have eliminated the theory of your death. That leaves us with three other options: you’re either asleep, unconscious, or in a prolonged coma. »
  • « Okay, sounds legit. But why is my brain displaying this particular scene? Isn’t it unable to project pictures of things that it hadn’t seen yet? »
  • « True. But It has already registered all these pictures in your mind and combined them together in this particular scene. Look closely, you’ll figure out what I’m saying. Wait, let me pause right here. Get closer. Alright, look at Safraoui’s face and clothes. Haven’t you seen her make the same face and wear the same clothes before? Now look at Youssef, haven’t you seen him wear the same clothes and stand in that Cristiano-Ronaldo-like pose? Are you following my trail of thoughts? »
  • « Right, right. But hey, I don’t own those sweat pants, nor that tank top. How do you explain that? »
  • « I’m rolling my eyes so hard I think I’ve seen my retina. YOU’VE SEEN THEM WHILE WINDOWN SHOPPING ONLINE MORON. »
  • « Calm down man. Jeez. »
  • « I’m you, man. How dare you question yourself? »
  • « Touché. Sorry. Alright, so, what is this? What’s my brain trying to do? »
  • « He’s trying to walk you down through memory lane. He’s testing you dude. Can’t you see it? You’re trapped. Ugh… You’re unbelievably clueless. Let me bring it down to you: You’re in a prolonged coma and if you’d like to wake up again or EVER, you’ve to pass your brain’s test. I’ve said enough already. From now on, you’ll get nothing out of me but riddles and hints because, DUH, you’ve got to figure it out on your own. »
  • « My brain is such a… Penis! Fine. I’m ready for whatever that prick throws at me. »
  • « Yeah right, whatever. Follow me »

In a blink of an eye, it became pitch black. A surge of adrenaline rushes through my entire body. This is no time for a fight or flight response. I’m afraid of the dark. I have been since I was a child and I couldn’t get over it. I try to calm myself down. Maybe this is one of my brain’s tests. Maybe, he’s trying to get me over my fear of the dark. That would make him a good guy with unusual ways and extreme conditions. I could stay in a prolonged coma stasis for the rest of my life. Who am I kidding? The doctors would just give up and pull the plug, a literal one, on me.

I steady my breath, by remember some Yoga tricks to balance myself. I close my eyes for a second and when I open them… I’m in a street fight?

Someone’s throwing a punch at me and I duck on instinct. Phew… That Body Combat training had finally come in handy. I’ve seen this place before. I know this guy. I’ve been wanting to bash his face for hitting on my girlfriend for ages. Sounds like I’m starring in my own martial arts movie, directed by my sadistic brain. Alright, brain, what do you want me to do so I could pass your test?

If I hit back, that might mean that I’m an aggressive person with anger issues who sees violence as a viable option to solving problems. Well, yeah I think violence is a viable option for solving problems, SOMETIMES. I’m not an aggressive person though. He swung at me first so, if I swing back that would be considered self-defense. I like my lawyer-like reasoning. I lean back as a semi-circular hook grazes my nose and I instantly grab his extended hand, turn on my heels and judo-slam him on the cement floor. The sound of his back pummeling the ground sends goosebumps down my spine. Maybe I could’ve countered in a less devastating way?

Who cares? The dude’s a projection.

And there he is. That snob, smug-faced me shaking his head in disapproval like black women do in the movies.

  • “What now?”
  • “You’re supposed to care even if he’s just a projection. You failed this test. However, your brain is a charitable organ so, he’s giving you another chance to rectify your misdemeanor. But be careful, I don’t know how much generosity our brain is capable of. “

And poof, he is gone again. Great! Thanks for the heads up, prick.

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The Dual Nature of Fear: Protector and Parasite

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Fear: Friend or Foe?

What if fear isn’t your enemy but your greatest ally? Explore how this powerful emotion secretly shapes your life and might be the key to unlocking your true self.

 

The Quest for Self-Discovery

As individuals and members of the human race, we should devote our greatest effort to discovering who we truly are. We often arrogantly proclaim to know ourselves better than anyone else, but do we? When we hear the word “fear,” what’s the first thing that comes to mind? It likely conjures images of trauma and negative experiences. This amalgamation of letters has gripped many of us, playing a significant role in our existence.

 

Fear’s Significance and History

“Fear.” This small word may seem insignificant, yet it is full of meaning and history. Most people deeply care about their lives, and this tendency exists thanks to fear, even if many tremble at the mere mention of it.

 

The Denial of Fear

As humans, we have a tendency to deny what we don’t understand. We often deny our fear. This is understandable; we are naturally drawn to heroic narratives. Everyone loves tales of bravery and fearlessness. We revel in stories of victory and triumph. So, why should we care about fear?

 

Fear as a Fundamental Human Trait

Fear is a fundamental aspect of our humanity. What kind of brave person denies their true identity, unless we are discussing cowardice? Fear is a powerful emotion; it can speak without uttering a word. While fear may make us seem weak or inferior, it can also affirm our humanity. Fear serves as both a guardian and a ruler, governing our choices and decisions. And believe me, ruling is no easy task, especially in an unstable democracy of emotions and chemicals.

 

Fear as a Survival Mechanism

When the kingdom is under attack, fear can override reason and logic to ensure survival, even if the perceived danger is illusory. Fear acts as a musician, playing the drumbeats of our lives, its music resonating with the world around us. This vibration takes hold of the souls of all living beings.

 

Fear’s Role in Time and Perception

When fear takes charge, we feel our existence connect with the universe. We sense our lives intertwining with something vast and complex. Time slows down, transforming into something else entirely, while our perception sharpens, turning our world into a battlefield.

 

Fear as the Overprotective Mother

Fear can be likened to an overprotective mother, striving to shield her children, yet her protectiveness may hinder their growth and limit their potential. This complex emotion plays dual roles, serving as both protector and sage.

 

Fear’s Parasitic Nature

This inherited facet of our evolution influences our daily behaviors and shapes our character. At times, it turns into a parasite, draining our energy and hindering our progress. Unlike typical parasites, this inner fire originates from our own being; it can stifle our movement or compel us to act impulsively.

 

Fear’s Betrayal in Communication

This force can sometimes act disloyally, betraying its creator. For example, when our fear of judgment undermines our ability to communicate clearly, it jeopardizes our goals ,whether making a good impression or articulating a point. Miscommunication often leads to misunderstandings.

 

The Overwhelming Force of Fear

Viewing the world from this perspective can be enlightening, even if we cannot prove we share the same perceptions. When fear becomes overwhelming, it can manifest as a mentally unstable individual grappling with severe trust issues. This emotion does not easily relinquish control over our destiny or our capacity for change.

 

Fear’s Relationship with Learning and Future Prediction

Fear compels us to obsess over predicting the future and learning from the past, as it intensely despises pain, especially when repeated. Fear’s aversion to pain fuels our motivation and imagination, enabling us to predict effectively and avoid obstacles. Surprisingly, fear can accelerate the learning process.

 

Fear’s Role in Human Beliefs

This complex chemical response empowers human beliefs and convictions, adding a unique spark that transforms them into dogma, shaping our behavior. Fear renders beliefs unquestionable; when we deny our beliefs, we deny our identity. All humans have standards, fortified by fear. Without fear, we are nobody. Fear is, in essence, us.

 

Modern Fears and Illusions

Our fears of change, rejection, the unknown, failure, loneliness, dissatisfaction, and unmet expectations are illusions that have become overly significant in our lives. While desire undeniably influences these fears, they have overshadowed fear’s original purpose: survival and the preservation of our existence.

 

Mental Survival in the 21st Century

We still engage in the same primitive survival game, but today’s survival is more mental than physical. In the 21st century, we battle internal dangers and threats. The technological and scientific revolution has shifted our struggles from the external world to our minds.

 

Emptiness and the Human Spirit

Homo sapiens no longer strive to coexist with the external world; our focus has shifted to mental survival. Humanity, with its problem-solving tendencies, may even create challenges just to enjoy overcoming them. While we abhor pain, we also cannot tolerate emptiness.

 

Fear and the Freedom of Choice

The human spirit is unaccustomed to emptiness and the freedom of choice. We thrive under pressure. Fear, once selected by nature for survival, has become less useful in a world dominated by peace. Our violent nature, no longer expressed physically, threatens either our destruction or our evolution.

 

The Inner Predators

If violence once protected us from external threats, today’s predators reside within us. Can we protect ourselves from ourselves and our potential actions? This is a question we must explore.

 

The Future of Fear

We try to envision virtual dangers to validate fear, but how long can this continue? Is it possible that fear will eventually be selected out by nature and become obsolete? If fear’s only remaining role is in competition, isn’t that more closely related to greed, desire, and humanity’s inherent hunger for power and occupation? Can fear survive in the modern world? That is the question.

 

Written By: Habib Riden

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